Self Destructive Behavior: Signs, Causes, and Treatment

In the shadows of our minds, self-destructive behavior lurks, often unnoticed until it wreaks havoc on our lives. This pattern of actions, often causing physical or mental harm, traps individuals in a relentless cycle of pain, temporary relief, and overwhelming guilt. 

Whether linked to mental health disorders like schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and ADHD, or arising independently, these behaviors are deeply rooted in traumatic experiences and unhealthy coping mechanisms. If you or someone you know has been engaging in self-destructive behavior, knowing the signs can make a world of difference in outcomes. 

What Is Self Destructive Behavior?

Self-destructive behavior is a pattern of actions that cause physical or mental harm to oneself. Individuals engaging in such behaviors often feel trapped in a cycle of pain; they seek temporary relief from distress, which is followed by shame and guilt, perpetuating the cycle. While these behaviors are sometimes linked to mental health disorders like schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and ADHD, they can also occur without such diagnoses. 

Traumatic events, painful memories, and unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as substance abuse, can trigger self-destructive actions. Additionally, growing up in a traumatic environment can lead to repeating these harmful behaviors. Understanding the causes and signs is crucial for addressing and treating self-destructive behavior effectively.

What Causes Self Destructive Behavior?

Self-destructive behavior can stem from a variety of factors, and is typically rooted in psychological and environmental influences:

• Trauma and Past Experiences: Traumatic events, such as abuse, neglect, or significant loss, can lead to self-destructive behaviors. Individuals may turn to harmful actions as a way to cope with unresolved pain and emotions​​​​.

• Mental Health Disorders: Conditions like depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, and schizophrenia are often associated with self-destructive behaviors. These disorders can impair an individual's ability to manage emotions and stress, leading to harmful coping mechanisms​​​​.

• Emotional Regulation Difficulties: Some individuals struggle with regulating their emotions and may resort to self-harm or other destructive behaviors to express or alleviate intense feelings of anger, sadness, or frustration​​​​.

• Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms: People may develop self-destructive behaviors as a way to deal with stress, anxiety, or negative emotions. This can include substance abuse, overeating, or self-harm, which provide temporary relief but ultimately exacerbate the problem​​.

• Environmental Influences: Growing up in a traumatic or unstable environment can contribute to the development of self-destructive behaviors. Children who witness or experience self-harm or substance abuse are more likely to adopt similar behaviors as coping mechanisms​​.

• Feelings of Guilt and Shame: Engaging in self-destructive behavior can create a cycle where the temporary relief it provides is followed by intense feelings of guilt and shame, which then fuel further destructive actions​​​​.

Types of Self Destructive Behavior 

Self-destructive behavior can manifest in various forms, each impacting your physical and emotional well-being. Here’s an overview of different types of self-destructive actions:

• Self-Harm: This includes cutting, burning, or hitting yourself. These actions may provide temporary relief from emotional pain but cause physical harm and perpetuate feelings of shame and guilt​​​​.

• Substance Abuse: Using drugs or alcohol to cope with stress or emotional pain is a common form of self-destructive behavior. While it might offer short-term relief, substance abuse can lead to addiction, health problems, and further emotional distress​​.

• Eating Disorders: Behaviors such as binge eating, purging, or starving yourself are harmful ways to cope with emotional issues. These actions can severely impact your physical health and self-esteem​​.

• Risky Behavior: Engaging in unsafe sexual practices, reckless driving, or other dangerous activities can be a way to escape emotional pain or feel a sense of control. These behaviors can lead to serious physical harm and emotional consequences​​.

• Negative Self-Talk: Constantly criticizing yourself, blaming yourself for things beyond your control, and fostering a negative self-image can erode your self-esteem and lead to further self-destructive actions​​.

• Isolation: Withdrawing from friends, family, and social activities can be a form of self-punishment and a way to avoid dealing with emotional pain. Isolation can increase feelings of loneliness and depression​​.

• Procrastination and Self-Sabotage: Deliberately putting off important tasks, missing deadlines, or sabotaging your own success are forms of self-destructive behavior that can hinder your personal and professional growth​​.

• Overworking: Excessive work can be a way to avoid dealing with personal issues. While it might seem productive, overworking can lead to burnout, health issues, and strained relationships​​.

• Neglecting Self-Care: Failing to take care of your physical and emotional needs, such as neglecting sleep, hygiene, or medical care, can have serious consequences for your health and well-being​​.

Recognizing these behaviors in yourself is the first step toward seeking help, and developing healthier coping strategies. Other signs of self destructive behavior, such as unexplained scars, impulsive actions, or neglecting one’s health, can signal a need for help as well.

What Are the Signs of Self Destructive Behavior?

Since fear of humiliation, shame, and embarrassment are the foundation of self-destructive behavior, these individuals tend to hide. People with such tendencies display secretive behavior, often making it difficult to identify signs. Here’s a list of common signs:

• Unexplained scars and injuries.

• Overall impulsive behavior.

• Wearing long-sleeved clothing regardless of cold weather.

• Overlooking personal and professional obligations puts an individual in jeopardy.

• Neglecting one's health and commitments.

• Bruises and cuts are fresh on the skin.

• Explaining helplessness whenever discussing problems. 

Common Examples of Self-Destructive Behavior

There are several variations in self-destructive behavior, ranging from apparent tendencies to subtle ones. Some common examples are:

• Drunk driving

• Risky behavior

• Emotionally abusing people you love

• Watching excessive TV

• Being stuck in toxic relationships

• Social media obsession

• Overlooking healthy needs and emotional support

• Risking relationships by cheating

• Engaging in risky sexual behavior

• Procrastinating

• Ruminating past

• Continuously putting oneself down

• Isolating oneself from others' company and community

• Self-harm

• Reckless driving

• Self-inflicted injuries

• Suicide

How to Deal with Self Destructive Behavior?

There are several ways one can stop their spiraling behavior towards self-destruction. These include:

• Listing values and personality that you want to be.

• Note down why you should not impulsively act on things and the negative implications of doing that.

• Allowing yourself to do things differently.

• Plan ahead and strategize things to do if your behavior prediction turns out right.

• Turn towards mindfulness activities and meditation.

• Grieve for the time you have lost in the past. 

How to Stop Self Destructive Behavior

Stopping self-destructive behavior requires a multi-faceted approach that addresses both the underlying causes and the behaviors themselves. Here are some strategies to help you on your journey to recovery:

1. Seek Professional Help: Working with a therapist or counselor can provide you with the tools and support you need to understand and change your behavior. Therapies such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) are particularly effective for addressing self-destructive behaviors​​​​.

2. Identify Triggers: Understanding what triggers your self-destructive behavior is crucial. Keep a journal to track your thoughts, emotions, and circumstances leading up to these behaviors. This can help you identify patterns and develop strategies to avoid or cope with triggers​​.

3. Develop Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Replace self-destructive behaviors with healthier alternatives. This might include physical activities, creative outlets like art or music, or relaxation techniques such as meditation and deep breathing​​​​.

4. Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who understand your struggles. Joining support groups, either in person or online, can also provide a sense of community and shared experience​​.

5. Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself. Acknowledge that overcoming self-destructive behavior is a process and that setbacks are part of the journey. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would offer a friend in a similar situation​​.

6. Set Realistic Goals: Break down your goals into manageable steps. Focus on making small, positive changes that gradually lead to larger improvements. Celebrate your successes, no matter how small they may seem​​.

7. Avoid Substance Abuse: If you use drugs or alcohol as a way to cope, seek help to address these issues. Substance abuse can exacerbate self-destructive behaviors and hinder your ability to develop healthier coping mechanisms​​.

8. Stay Committed to Treatment: Adherence to therapy and medication is essential for long-term recovery. Regularly attending therapy sessions and following your treatment plan can help you stay on track and make progress​​.

9. Create a Safety Plan: Develop a plan for times when you feel overwhelmed by urges to engage in self-destructive behavior. This might include contacting a trusted friend, engaging in a distraction activity, or using a crisis hotline​​.

By implementing these strategies and seeking appropriate support, you can work towards overcoming self-destructive behaviors and achieving a healthier, more fulfilling life. Remember, recovery is a journey, and it's okay to ask for help along the way.

Closing Thoughts: Self-Destructive Behavior

Self-destructive behaviors can feel isolating and overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that you are not alone. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward seeking help and developing healthier coping strategies. If you or someone you know is struggling with self-destructive behaviors, reach out for support. There is hope, and with the right help, it is possible to break free from these harmful cycles and lead a healthier, more fulfilling life.

Struggling with Self Destructive Behavior? We're Here to Help

The Forge Recovery Center is here to help. Our team of dedicated mental health professionals offers a range of therapies designed to address self-destructive behaviors and their underlying causes. If you or a loved one are engaging in self-destructive patterns, don’t hesitate to call us today. Together, we can work towards a brighter, healthier future.

Written by

The Forge Recovery Center

Reviewed by

Jeremy Arzt

Chief Clinical Officer

December 28, 2024